Relationships.

[PikaPikari]

My boyfriend and I have been together for two years. Before we were dating, he was my best friend (still is) and he is probably the only person I fully trust. We were both in bad, long term relationships before our own and we helped each other get through those. Things just fell into place and now we are in love. I couldn't be happier with anyone else.

My one pet peeve about relationships are the couples that are all like "OHEHMGEE WE R IN LURV 43V3R BABEH I LUV YEW SO MUCH<33333"...like seriously...no. I believe that if someone acts like that with their partner, they are either A) REALLY immature or B) Trying to set up a guard over their insecurities that they actually have over their relationship.

Hmm, a bit about my boyfriend...his name is Carlos, he is from Cuba. He speaks Spanish, English, and French. He doesn't know a lot about old school gaming like I do...but he likes to play LoL, Skyrim, Mass Effect 3, etc. He is a big Trekkie and Star Wars fan (which is not something I am into...but I deal with it). He loves science and math. SO yep. Oh he likes cats...that's something else we have in common. meow.

[Sohakmet]

I once had a relationship, but it was stale and it didn't work out. I really felt that I was more with the girl just to not make her feel sad, because I didn't want in any way to get along with her, I mean... maybe I ahd the wrong concepts about her in the beggining and after sometime you get to know what someone really is.

We were completely different and everything was just awkward.

Also, yeah, I'm single.

[Beardy]

(07-17-2012 06:43 AM)PikaPikari Wrote:  Hmm, a bit about my boyfriend...his name is Carlos

If his surname is Blanka then you win at relationships. Everyone else in the world needs to split up.

Who thinks exciting passion is important and who thinks day-to-day comfort is important?

[EternalSunnyD]

I like to mess around a lot

[Nuudoru]

(07-17-2012 10:08 AM)Beardy Wrote:  Who thinks exciting passion is important and who thinks day-to-day comfort is important?

Can't you just go for something in the middle?

[Arjahn]

(07-17-2012 06:08 PM)Nuudoru Wrote:  

(07-17-2012 10:08 AM)Beardy Wrote:  Who thinks exciting passion is important and who thinks day-to-day comfort is important?

Can't you just go for something in the middle?

That'd be the Belly Button, and that's pretty f***ed up dude.

[EternalSunnyD]

(07-17-2012 06:09 PM)Arjahn Wrote:  

(07-17-2012 06:08 PM)Nuudoru Wrote:  

(07-17-2012 10:08 AM)Beardy Wrote:  Who thinks exciting passion is important and who thinks day-to-day comfort is important?

Can't you just go for something in the middle?

That'd be the Belly Button, and that's pretty f***ed up dude.

Have you ever fucked a belly button

[Arjahn]

(07-17-2012 06:18 PM)EternalSunnyD Wrote:  

(07-17-2012 06:09 PM)Arjahn Wrote:  

(07-17-2012 06:08 PM)Nuudoru Wrote:  

(07-17-2012 10:08 AM)Beardy Wrote:  Who thinks exciting passion is important and who thinks day-to-day comfort is important?

Can't you just go for something in the middle?

That'd be the Belly Button, and that's pretty f***ed up dude.

Have you ever fucked a belly button

Or we could just say it out load, that works too.

[Beware of Cuccos]

(07-17-2012 12:03 AM)Cinna Wrote:  technically i'm in a relationship right now, but we haven't seen or even really talked to each other since we started dating, and it's been like a month now. i don't count it as anything because of the lack of communication, and i should probably say something soon. i'm sure he feels the same anyway.

but then there's my ex that i've mentioned before, we dated on and off for 6 1/2 months. first guy i fell in love with, and the only reason we started going on and off was because during our incredibly short first break up, he fucked someone else. after that it was never really the same, but i still loved him. there were really only two times where we were both truly happy with everything, that's the first month or so we started dating and the time around when he proposed. that only went on for about a month though and we broke up again. shortly after our last break up he dated someone else, they were on and off for 4 1/2 months. now him and i are back to talking again, and i want to be back with him so much. i can be so comfortable around him.

Both of these sound almost exactly like some relationships i've been in. My most recent ex- We rarely talked or saw each other. He loved me, and I loved him too, but it just wasn't in the way we thought. We ended things on good terms.

The first ex- We dated for 6 months. It felt like 10 years. I was 19. I was so in love with him. I sacrificed everything for him. He would cheat on me, break up with me, sleep with someone and come back, but swore up and down that he loved me. Then suddenly one day he broke up with me, and started hanging out with my best friend, A LOT. I was broken. For years. It was horrible. I was miserable. When I was 23 I met..

The second ex- At this point I think I was just desperate and horny. I dated this fool for two years. He hated my tattoos, wouldn't go to any family gatherings, wouldn't allow me to take any pictures of us together, wouldn't even let me put that I was in a relationship on facebook. He had a house and car that his parents gave him, didn't have a job, and was just a lazy drunk. There's nothing wrong with being a lazy drunk, but that's how he was ALL THE TIME. He would go out of his way to make me miserable because he thought it was funny.

Not long after him I started dating the most recent ex, and that ended a few months ago. All i've ever wanted was a family, but now at 26 I feel my time is running out and I am fully prepared to die alone waist deep in cats.

Cinna- I've been through some shit. I suggest you be very cautious, but only YOU know what's right for you. No one else can make that decision for you. I hope everything works out for the best and if you ever need help or anything, feel free to PM me. I'm kind of a pro at bad boyfriends.


Now, as far as what I want in relationships- I want a guy that does not cheat or lie. Someone that will not make fun of me or my tattoos. Someone that likes my friends and family. I want someone I can cuddle up on the couch with and watch a horror movie or play games with. Someone who enjoys the same music as myself. Someone that won't get mad that most of my friends are dudes. I want to be able to cook dinner without him telling me "well I do it this way" and just fucking enjoy it.

---

(07-17-2012 10:08 AM)Beardy Wrote:  Who thinks exciting passion is important and who thinks day-to-day comfort is important?

I enjoy day-to-day comfort myself, I like knowing i'm being held by someone that loves me, but I think everyone has times where the urge strikes and you just need to go out, find yourself an acceptable member of your preferred sex, and have a night of fucking. No kissing, no last names.

So I would say both are important.

[gsninja]

(07-17-2012 10:08 AM)Beardy Wrote:  Who thinks exciting passion is important and who thinks day-to-day comfort is important?

I'd be hard-pressed to say one is more important than the other. Day-to-day comfort is a given, but especially considering we're still young, I don't think we would want a relationship devoid of some sort of exciting passion.

(07-18-2012 11:28 PM)Beware of Cuccos Wrote:  Not long after him I started dating the most recent ex, and that ended a few months ago. All i've ever wanted was a family, but now at 26 I feel my time is running out and I am fully prepared to die alone waist deep in cats.

Looks like you dated a couple of fairly high-tier douchebags lol. What even attracted you to them in the first place?

[BumblebeeCody]

(07-18-2012 11:28 PM)Beware of Cuccos Wrote:  

(07-17-2012 12:03 AM)Cinna Wrote:  technically i'm in a relationship right now, but we haven't seen or even really talked to each other since we started dating, and it's been like a month now. i don't count it as anything because of the lack of communication, and i should probably say something soon. i'm sure he feels the same anyway.

but then there's my ex that i've mentioned before, we dated on and off for 6 1/2 months. first guy i fell in love with, and the only reason we started going on and off was because during our incredibly short first break up, he fucked someone else. after that it was never really the same, but i still loved him. there were really only two times where we were both truly happy with everything, that's the first month or so we started dating and the time around when he proposed. that only went on for about a month though and we broke up again. shortly after our last break up he dated someone else, they were on and off for 4 1/2 months. now him and i are back to talking again, and i want to be back with him so much. i can be so comfortable around him.

Both of these sound almost exactly like some relationships i've been in. My most recent ex- We rarely talked or saw each other. He loved me, and I loved him too, but it just wasn't in the way we thought. We ended things on good terms.

(1 The first ex- We dated for 6 months. It felt like 10 years. I was 19. I was so in love with him. I sacrificed everything for him. He would cheat on me, break up with me, sleep with someone and come back, but swore up and down that he loved me. Then suddenly one day he broke up with me, and started hanging out with my best friend, A LOT. I was broken. For years. It was horrible. I was miserable. When I was 23 I met..

@2 The second ex- At this point I think I was just desperate and horny. I dated this fool for two years. He hated my tattoos, wouldn't go to any family gatherings, wouldn't allow me to take any pictures of us together, wouldn't even let me put that I was in a relationship on facebook. He had a house and car that his parents gave him, didn't have a job, and was just a lazy drunk. There's nothing wrong with being a lazy drunk, but that's how he was ALL THE TIME. He would go out of his way to make me miserable because he thought it was funny.

(3 Not long after him I started dating the most recent ex, and that ended a few months ago. All i've ever wanted was a family, but now at 26 I feel my time is running out and I am fully prepared to die alone waist deep in cats.

Cinna- I've been through some shit. I suggest you be very cautious, but only YOU know what's right for you. No one else can make that decision for you. I hope everything works out for the best and if you ever need help or anything, feel free to PM me. I'm kind of a pro at (4 bad boyfriends.

(5 Now, as far as what I want in relationships- I want a guy that does not cheat or lie. Someone that will not make fun of me or my tattoos. Someone that likes my friends and family. I want someone I can cuddle up on the couch with and watch a horror movie or play games with. Someone who enjoys the same music as myself. Someone that won't get mad that most of my friends are dudes. I want to be able to cook dinner without him telling me "well I do it this way" and just fucking enjoy it.

@1 I hate people like that. They really don't give a rats arse about the person. Odd how nice people get treated like that because that's one of the worst ways to disrespect someone.

@2 Those dudes(and dudettes) that bring an overbearing force down on another person are pretty pathetic. I never understood this thought of "I can have full control over this person". Talk about being in shackles much...

@3 That's pretty understandable at age 26. But if time is running out, at least be sure that you don't rush into another relationship. To be mistreated once is terrible but to be mistreated a second is honestly pretty upsetting. It's unfair :/

@4 Exactly as I would put it. Simply put to Cinna, the dude is a bad boyfriend.

@5 Kinda the same. No joke, I LOOOOVE a madam with tattoos. The really amazing ones. Like a full arm sleeve art piece, or maybe a gaming related tattoo. It's so awesome. But I know that a lot of dudes hate females with tattoos, or only like the little small ones like a butterfly or something simple. Agreed with the rest of the paragraph too. Respect is probably the key aspect here.




Now gather around kids(and people older than me) as I explain my story. *Strums guitar*

I was around the age of 16-17 when I found true love. I've only ever had one girlfriend and it was OK. Nothing bad happened but we split up once we went to different secondary schools. But I went the entire of secondary school without getting a girlfriend, mainly because I didn't find to my liking or because I couldn't return the feelings. I wanted to wait to get into the open world and find someone there. I did, and my days, was she awesome. Liked Pokemon, loved Anime and Manga, had a great sense of humour, had a lovely American accent and was probably the best looking madam in the world. No female whether famous or not could compare to the sheer beauty of her. She only wore light makeup too. We met a few times are London convention and damn I enjoyed spending time with her. Even going to see her in Leeds at one point. One of the best times I ever had was staying up till 5am everyday during a week holiday. Just us two on webcam watching videos or drawing silly images on MSN.

But I often found she used to lie about herself. Making up parts about what she's done and who she knows. Even though, I knew she was lying I never called her out on it. Then, 2 years since we first met I was told by a friend that the name I knew her by wasn't her actual name. So for two years the person I've has been speaking to non-stop on MSN even met in person, wasn't actually her name. I never told my friends about her because it would seem kinda pointless, I had none person to talk to then because she also knew her(still friends). But I pretty much had to through it on my own.

The amount of pain, knowing that you fell in love with someone who, pretty much, didn't exist is horrible. I put a lot of trust in her and loved her more than anyone. Was pretty much the perfect girl but it wasn't really real. Kinda hard to explain.

See I like the more down to Mars girls than the ones who are the "irritating" type. I don't find girls who wear lots of makeup or show off big boobs attractive. I love a girl with a strong sense of individuality. Has intelligence, humour, self dignity and doesn't flaunt herself (and obviously has the same interests). I don't find those Cheryl Cole/Megan Fox types attractive in anyway because they lack any decent qualities, which obviously results to me being called gay by other wanker males. So when I do find one, I respect them a lot more.

[Beware of Cuccos]

(07-19-2012 12:15 AM)gsninja Wrote:  

(07-18-2012 11:28 PM)Beware of Cuccos Wrote:  Not long after him I started dating the most recent ex, and that ended a few months ago. All i've ever wanted was a family, but now at 26 I feel my time is running out and I am fully prepared to die alone waist deep in cats.

Looks like you dated a couple of fairly high-tier douchebags lol. What even attracted you to them in the first place?

#1 Started out sweet and perfect.
#2 I was lonely and desperate.
#3 Had sex with me and was good at it. At first.

---

(07-19-2012 12:43 AM)BumblebeeCody Wrote:  @1 I hate people like that. They really don't give a rats arse about the person. Odd how nice people get treated like that because that's one of the worst ways to disrespect someone.

@2 Those dudes(and dudettes) that bring an overbearing force down on another person are pretty pathetic. I never understood this thought of "I can have full control over this person". Talk about being in shackles much...

@3 That's pretty understandable at age 26. But if time is running out, at least be sure that you don't rush into another relationship. To be mistreated once is terrible but to be mistreated a second is honestly pretty upsetting. It's unfair :/

@4 Exactly as I would put it. Simply put to Cinna, the dude is a bad boyfriend.

@5 Kinda the same. No joke, I LOOOOVE a madam with tattoos. The really amazing ones. Like a full arm sleeve art piece, or maybe a gaming related tattoo. It's so awesome. But I know that a lot of dudes hate females with tattoos, or only like the little small ones like a butterfly or something simple. Agreed with the rest of the paragraph too. Respect is probably the key aspect here.

3- The reason I use the term "time is running out" is because i've always wanted a family, but women only have a certain number of eggs. Men can reproduce all their lives, but a womans most fertile period is between the ages of 25-35.

5- I wish I could get sleeves! I've got them where a tshirt can cover them when i'm at work, but a tank top shows them when i'm at home.

I JUST WANT THE DARLING TO MY HONEY. Is that so much to ask?

---

(07-19-2012 12:43 AM)BumblebeeCody Wrote:  Now gather around kids(and people older than me) as I explain my story. *Strums guitar*

I was around the age of 16-17 when I found true love. I've only ever had one girlfriend and it was OK. Nothing bad happened but we split up once we went to different secondary schools. But I went the entire of secondary school without getting a girlfriend, mainly because I didn't find to my liking or because I couldn't return the feelings. I wanted to wait to get into the open world and find someone there. I did, and my days, was she awesome. Liked Pokemon, loved Anime and Manga, had a great sense of humour, had a lovely American accent and was probably the best looking madam in the world. No female whether famous or not could compare to the sheer beauty of her. She only wore light makeup too. We met a few times are London convention and damn I enjoyed spending time with her. Even going to see her in Leeds at one point. One of the best times I ever had was staying up till 5am everyday during a week holiday. Just us two on webcam watching videos or drawing silly images on MSN.

But I often found she used to lie about herself. Making up parts about what she's done and who she knows. Even though, I knew she was lying I never called her out on it. Then, 2 years since we first met I was told by a friend that the name I knew her by wasn't her actual name. So for two years the person I've has been speaking to non-stop on MSN even met in person, wasn't actually her name. I never told my friends about her because it would seem kinda pointless, I had none person to talk to then because she also knew her(still friends). But I pretty much had to through it on my own.

The amount of pain, knowing that you fell in love with someone who, pretty much, didn't exist is horrible. I put a lot of trust in her and loved her more than anyone. Was pretty much the perfect girl but it wasn't really real. Kinda hard to explain.

See I like the more down to Mars girls than the ones who are the "irritating" type. I don't find girls who wear lots of makeup or show off big boobs attractive. I love a girl with a strong sense of individuality. Has intelligence, humour, self dignity and doesn't flaunt herself (and obviously has the same interests). I don't find those Cheryl Cole/Megan Fox types attractive in anyway because they lack any decent qualities, which obviously results to me being called gay by other wanker males. So when I do find one, I respect them a lot more.

[/font][/color]

You poor thing that sounds like a shitstorm. I'm sending you virtual hugs as we speak You'll find your soulmate!

Sometimes I feel like wearing a lot of makeup, but even then I only wear eye makeup. I hate face makeup. But most of the time I don't wear any at all, or just eyeliner/mascara. As far as the big boobs thing goes- i'm a 36DD and it is very hard to find clothes that fit properly. If I wear certain types of tshirts, it squeezes on my chest and it's harder to breathe. So a lot of the time I wear very low cut shirts, but very rarely do I do it for attention. When I do do it for attention, it's for the simple purpose of getting laid. All other times, my boobs are out because it's the only way I can breathe haha.

[Beardy]

Well, my ideal relationship has nothing to do with love or passion or anything. Just a nice looking lady who would be willing to be naked with me now and then and is a buddy. Screw love. And I absolutely wouldn't want to "share my life" with anyone. But that's just me.

After a few relationships and some one-nighters (I won't go into the sordid details), I'm basically celibate these days, and I don't really have too much of a problem with that. Do I get frustrated? Yes. Does it balance out with the problems I'd have if I was on the pull? More than yes.

[Nuudoru]

Alright, time for some real talk.

A few years ago I somehow ended up scoring a girlfriend through the internet. So it was a Longdistance relationship. Since this was my first relationship at all I was so excited like god damn. Having a girlfriend was awesome, even though I could never actually meet or touch her. After 2-3 months things already started to get pretty bad, might even say unhealthy. She was very needy and text messaged me like a mad man. 27 messages when I woke up in the morning? Shrugged it off like it was tuesday. She was like that. That wasn't what really disturbed our relationship at first. What made it even more annoying that she was needy was how I am. I have always know I'm not boyfriend material. This is not bad self-esteem talking. I'm just have always preferred solitude and I need it function in my daily life. She never really gave me the space to give me solitude, which backfired with me being able to disappear from everywhere for several days just to be alone. Both our attitudes led to us fight a lot which made us both very depressed and sad.
In an attempt to save our relationship I scrambled together my last cash to visit her. My visit to her went far beyond my expectations. She was beautiful and we clicked very naturally with eachother and shared our first kiss on day one. Too bad her parents didn't really click with me though.. After being there for a couple of days it turns out her parents hated me and told me I could never visit their house again. This shocked me, her, and took a hit on our relationship that it didn't need. After a lot of discussing we somehow decided that our love was the right thing and kept it going even though we were kind of depressed about how our relationship were. We started becoming pretty dependent on eachother because when we talked with eachother we finally felt really happy about everything. For the time, it was great. I finally got to visit her again when I decided to check in to a hostel instead just to give her parents the finger. Things went well that time. Maybe even better. It blew my teenage mind.
Now we come to the part which makes this whole relationship my worst experience ever. Back at home things weren't great overall. I lived with my mom, which was normal for my age, but she didn't quite like it anyway. She ended up getting a boyfriend that lived in another town and told me to move out. I was too young to get any welfare for that, so I had to move with her to a town where I knew no one. The move forced me to quit school and move far away from my friends. It was the first time in my life that I've had nobody to hang out with in the town I live in and I felt lonlier than ever. This made me depend even more on my girlfriend, which she didn't really mind. .. Which is what I thought. During my weakest moment, when all else had failed (no job, new school turned me down and no friends) she decided to break up with me. She wouldn't even talk me about it. All I knew was that it was over and that it couldn't work. When this happened I had literally lost everything and I completely broke apart. I didn't really cry because there was something new in me that had been crushed. Love is complicated. I comforted myself by thinking that the issue was that she didn't want a longdistance relationship. Then after a couple of days I see a picture of her kissing a new guy, who also lived very far away from her. This was a turning moment in my life. Before this, during my childhood, I had been both bullied and thrown out by my dad. But this.. That I felt when I saw that picture, left me with stronger emotions than anything else. I was done with relationships forever.

So nowadays my view of relationships at all isn't a very good one. I have always been surrounded by bad ones, and been in a very bad one. Some might say that I might be stubborn to still be like this after 4 years. It's just that I never want to go through what I once did. In the end I seriously feel like it wasn't worth it. I can't say that I regret being in a relationship since I left it behind me with wisdom, but it could've ended better. If I ever meet a girl one day that I really like, I might give it another shot. But until then? I won't even consider for a "she might be nice" relationship. I feel that I'm more picky than I should be. Especially since I've turned down two girls. Probably because both of them would end up being LDR.

Kudos to you if you actually read this through.

[Ouberry_13]

I suppose I'll share my story. I've only had one relationship, and it ended about a year and a half ago. It was with my friend of 4 years. He was the only person I trusted, the only person I was fully open and honest with. I was a very moody cynical person, who avoided most people, and stayed silent. Emo? Sure, call it if you will, I don't care. But, he was the only person who made me smile just by being near me. Over the course of 4 years, he managed to get me to open up and be more friendly. Without him, I'm fairly certain I'd still be fighting with myself about my sexuality, I'd still be the cold, distant person I used to be. After finally beginning to act like a normal person and whatnot, my friend decided to ask if I wanted to start dating. I said yes, since I kinda had feelings for him, since he did help me come out of my depressive attitude. But, after about 2 months, I realized that I didn't have strong feelings for him, only feelings of friendship. When I told him this, he told me he came to the same realization, so we decided to go back to being friends. It's been nearly a year and a half, and we've grown distant and rarely talk now. I don't see myself getting into another relationship anytime soon, partly because I don't know any other gay guys anywhere near me, and partly because I'm simply not interested in a relationship. Sure, it would be nice to have someone to spend my time with, but it's not like I crave that.